Week 2 Recap: I woke up at 8 every day! A small triumph. I've been completing my daily and weekly tasks from the Start Up Calendar, including identifying 3 new prospects each day. I've been doing this though LinkedIn, Biznik.com, and Google searches, much like how Colleen found a great list of acting schools in her latest Veteran's post.
Here's the problem:
I'm sitting here at my desk, in my pajamas and giant sheep slippers, with bed hair that accents the smudged mascara under my eyes. Beside me sits a cold cup of coffee. Even more appalling? It's 7pm. Yes, 7-PM. I didn't eat lunch today. I did not go to the gym. I did not shower. And I still have work to do. I wish I could blame this state on having the flu- but I'm perfectly healthy. The only sickness I'm suffering from is lack-of-balance.
Why do I admit this embarrassing truth? Because I'm here to be honest and talk about this process of self-employment in hopes that I might learn something—and help someone else who is dealing with the same challenges. I can't be the only one still in my sheep slippers at 7pm, can I?
Here was my plan for today:
I planned to get up at 8, do some work, go to the gym at 1 so I can watch Ellen while running on the treadmill, shower, come home, have a quick lunch, and get back to work. This has been my plan all week. But each day at 5pm, 6pm, 8pm I find myself in the same messy situation. On Friday, I realized that I'd only stepped outside and breathed fresh-air 3 times. And one of those times was to put out the recycling, which (although excellent for the environment) hardly counts as getting out of the house!
Yes, I've had an extremely productive week of working- but I've neglected everything else.
I'm a Libra. I love balance, I NEED balance, but I sometimes have a hard time achieving it. My all-or-nothing nature is going to need a serious kick in the sheep slippers.
I have a feeling the answer is simple. It could be as simple as just DOING it, no matter what. The same way I have to get out of bed by 8am, even if I'm tired.
To those of you who have achieved balance in self-employment… how do you fit it all in? When do you make time to exercise? Shower? Eat? Do you operate on a rigorous schedule each day—or is every day different?
Report in! How are you doing with your marketing plan? Remember, you don't have to be perfect to post- you just have to be trying. I'm hardly perfect in my sheep slippers, but I am certainly trying. I'm darn proud of that, and you should be too!
Hey, Deidre - I'm a Libra too. Love balance. Which is why I suggest you balance your freedom with some of the framework for performance that those dreaded corporations insist on ... specifically, get up at 8AM, take a shower, get dressed in real business clothes (yup, something a little more formal even than jeans!), fold up the PJs, tuck away the fuzzy slippers until bedtime, go walk around the block, maybe buy a cup of coffee or tea ... whatever, then come back to your desk and treat it like a job where you're working for somebody else.
Have a lunch break, have a time when your day ends, have a day when you "go home" and put your sheep slippers back on and kick back & relax.
(I go for a walk every morning before work - makes me feel like I'm walking to work. Also, I go out for a brief walk ... like 10 minutes to the post office, at noon. At 3PM, I go out for an hour's walk and listen to a favorite radio program - that's my "lunch" break. And I break every day at 6:30PM - it focuses the mind during the day to know that you have to be "out" by a certain time ... some lucky people who have to catch trains home have that discipline developed for them!)
That's what I have found works for me. Only getting out 3 times in a week ... that's a recipe for burn-out and lack of balance!
Posted by: TurtleBlueBird | January 22, 2009 at 10:31 AM
That should have been -- have a TIME when you "go home" -- above.
Good luck with it all! Your posts are wonderful!
Posted by: TurtleBlueBird | January 22, 2009 at 10:34 AM
TurtleBird, Thank you, this is great. I admire you for finding this schedule that works for you, and for sticking to it no matter what. The fact that you're a Libra too inspires me even more. I'm going to have a little think about what I want my schedule to be and then implement it. I love the idea of "walking to work in the morning" and I think it would really help me be balanced for the day. A scheduled lunch break, and a definite closing time. Thank you!
Posted by: Deidre | January 22, 2009 at 02:03 PM
I am definitely struggling with the same thing. Finding a balance, getting into a routine, etc. As part of my new year's resolution, I have been going to the gym. Trying to find a comfortable time to go has been a hardship. It seems like no matter what time I go - early in the morning or late in the evening - I get calls from my clients while I'm there. I feel so bad that I wasn't able to answer the phone when they called. But, the truth is I need to do this for myself. I need to be healthy and truth be told, it helps me to be happy as well. So, I need to start seeing it as a viable reason for not being available to my clients for an hour.
Well, surprise, I'm a libra as well, and it drives me crazy when things aren't balanced. But, I guess I just have to do the best I can. I have tried to get up at a consistent time every morning, hold consistent office hours and yes, even take a show and get dressed - although, I don't agree with TurtleBlueBird - I don't think you should wear business clothes unless you have a meeting - or unless you really really like wearing stuffy uncomfortable clothes - heck, I got out of corporate America so I could where what I wanted. I'm not dressing up for the dog.
Well, good luck. Let me know if you figure it out.
Posted by: Jamie | January 22, 2009 at 06:36 PM
I have spent more days in my PJs over the last 7 years than I am comfortable admitting. The quest for balance is constant, and sometimes I feel the most at ease when I just accept that a day in PJs is not so bad and not feel so guilty about it.
Figure out your comfort level and when you feel out of balance, make a change. But if you're being productive in PJs, just plow through your to do list AND plan for the next day (or the end of the week) to be a day of business clothes and appointments out of the house.
If you're trying to measure your success by how perfectly you accomplished everything that day, you're doomed.
Thanks for sharing your posts. I wish you all the best and look forward to reading more.
Posted by: Kelly Rozadowski | January 22, 2009 at 11:38 PM
Just to be clear, I don't think ANYONE should wear stuffy or uncomfortable clothes. But there's a world of options between PJs and an evening gown ... and all I can say is that I know I feel more "professional" in my "work clothes" than in my PJs. Or perhaps it's just that I feel less like crawling back into bed. (My father was a carpenter who never wore stuffy business clothes - still, he had clothes that made others and himself see him & accept him in the carpenter role.)
How long can it take to throw on khakis, a clean shirt and tie-up shoes ... even if they're sneakers? (There's a whole site devoted to helping moms get more organized - I don't follow it but, as a recall, their first directive was "Wear tie-up shoes." Seems it just says something good to the mind about how serious one is about getting organized and being productive. I wouldn't take it to extremes and I wear plenty of flats in summer. But slippers & slipper-equivalents ... well they have a point.)
Posted by: TurtleBlueBird | January 23, 2009 at 11:06 AM
I too have been all over the map in terms of all of the above. Recently I have realized that people would kill for the flexibility we have chosen being self employed - it's 10:45 on Friday morning and I just got home from a gym class. I switched my weekly meetings with Ilise to 8:30 so I can hit the 9:30 class - I have 2 kids and they get in the way too but I also was up until 12:00 a.m. last night sending out introductory emails to prospects and actually was communicating with a VP at 11:30 last night. It takes a while to figure it out. The work will always be there so take advantage of your situation and go to the gym. People in those offices are jealous of us!
Posted by: Jennifer | January 23, 2009 at 11:53 AM
My dog Lucy is a great routine keeper for me. If I am not out of bed and on a walk with her by 8:30am I have to add "clean the floor" to my daily "to do" list.
As a freelance photographer, I struggle with procrastination and staying focused when I am not shooting a job. Check out this site of how famous creatives structure their days:
http://dailyroutines.typepad.com/daily_routines/
Made me feel a little better. Good luck!
Posted by: Alison Gootee | January 23, 2009 at 12:45 PM
Great comments, thank you.
Jamie, Agreed, for me the gym is also about staying happy and sane. It needs to be a priority. I'd say, switch off the phone for an hour and take care of you-- there's nothing wrong with that!
Kelly, When you said, "If you're trying to measure your success by how perfectly you accomplished everything that day, you're doomed" it really made sense to me. You're absolutely right. I do measure my daily success by how perfect I was, and I need to stop!
Alison, thanks for the link. Looks like maybe if I start smoking cigars it will help my routine!
Posted by: Deidre | January 26, 2009 at 09:59 AM
Hi Deidre,
I have had many, many days exactly like the ones that you are describing. I lived, ate, slept and breathed my work. I neglected my husband and myself by not having a life outside of my work. I love what I do, but felt awful about myself for, what I perceived as having a lack of discipline.
I found balance by renting a studio/office space away from home. I moved all of my work out of the house and try to keep regular office hours at the studio. It has been wonderful! Sometimes, the extra rent can feel like a burden, but I love the fact that when it's time to go home, I do so and have a nice evening with my family. No work, no computer, no to-do list.
Hope that helps!
Christie
www.ModerneCaptureStudios.com
Posted by: Christie McQueen | January 26, 2009 at 10:37 AM
Great posts and comments, all!
I find my best days are ones where I can start reasonably early (7ish) and take the pups on a nice long walk or get in an hour of yoga before *anything else* begins. The fresh air and exercise feel good and help me to be more focused.
Beyond that, I firmly believe that we are in desperate need of more disconnected, unstructured time for our thoughts to just wander around in our heads doing whatever they do to put ideas together - away from glowing screens and beeping phones. So when I go for those walks, the phone stays at home.
Best wishes,
Merry
www.merryperrydesign.com
Posted by: Merry Perry | January 27, 2009 at 09:42 AM
OK, so I'm not a libra and I don't have fuzzy sheep slippers but I do share the same struggle. So much so, that a typical mantra of mine is the well known, "procrastinators unite tomorrow!" As a self employed communication designer I find that this struggle is more intense than even marketing my business.
All is not lost however. Since I picked up the marketing plan + calendar, I've worked some personal goals in to my business goals because really ,they go hand in hand.
I'm waking up before 8am to go running in the morning (thank God for beautiful San Diego weather to do this even in January), getting back in for a hearty breakfast, a quick read, hot shower and then off to work. Sometimes it doesn't go so smoothly but the point is to have guidelines to follow and stay on track throughout the day.
I appreciate your candid post Deidre, it's good to know we're not alone here.
Abe
http://www.thesoulcreative.com
Posted by: Abe | January 27, 2009 at 01:36 PM
Deidre, thank you for sharing your experience. I, too, feel overwhelmed by the irony of having flexible schedule but still need more time!
Things I'm doing now to help me battle my indecision and procrastination are:
1) writing down goals for the week every Monday - including exercising, doing laundry, etc., so I can check them off my list. Having goals inside marketing plan + calendar is also motivating me to work on my business.
2) getting ready for work (or being able to step outside of the apartment without embarrassing myself): change out of my pajamas, shower, make coffee and eat every day before I turn on my computer for work - it really does help to get my mind geared up. My "work clothes" are based on T-shirt and jeans - as long as you're comfortable, what you wear can be more formal or less formal.
All the other comments have been helpful, too - thank you all for sharing! I am now going to set start/stop time for my work, and I would like to learn to wake up earlier - as a night owl, I'm envious of fellow freelancers who are up by 5am so they can deal with clients who live three time zones ahead!
Posted by: Shiho | January 27, 2009 at 04:11 PM
I had a good chuckle while reading this article and all of the comments. I'm wearing sheepskin slippers right now! ...Very comfortable indeed, but with our privilege comes responsibility. It's curious how "hard" we all find it to stay on track (myself included!) and get our work done, but whenever I think I've got a hard job I look outside and think of the people swinging a pick-axe on the side of the road in the pouring rain. Here I am sipping coffee, taking an hour to eat a bagel, playing with ideas in my head then creating them on the computer, and... whining about difficulty?? The perspective is quite humbling to me.
Posted by: Todd Bennett | January 27, 2009 at 05:28 PM
Such great comments, everyone. I'm going to process all of this for my next post. Thanks!
Posted by: Deidre | January 28, 2009 at 11:44 AM